It's amazing how easily bored we can get. There is an interesting trend that, as soon as boredom sets in, our heads sink into chests, either to nod off, or to consult the delights of the all-knowing, all-entertaining mobile phone.
Interestingly, we get bored with pretty much everything. Animals get bored too. There are some very sad videos of horses pacing around their stables desperate to leave the shackles of their stable and to get into the paddock for a run around and explore. For animals, there is usually an alternative to being bored, some activity which will result in stimulation and thus some form of happiness. Animals' boredom usually results from a restriction imposed upon them (usually by human beings) which, when removed, allows that animal to be what it is.
Pain, hunger, thirst and fear have very clear causes and very clear methods of alleviation. To alleviate the boredom of the horse, you just need to open the stable door. To alleviate our boredom, we need to find the cause. Yet, does boredom have a cause? What sort of stimulation do we need?
As soon as a task becomes repetitive or samey, we lose interest and boredom sets in. Yet it doesn't feel as urgent as pain or fear. It's almost as if the very task of existing is repetitive or samey. The fact that humans can indeed suffer from ennui and weltschmerz points to our unease of just simply being. They are both recognized sensations. We know that weltschmerz is, by definition, a dissatisfaction with the world as it appears. Some people avoid it, finding everything in life to amuse them and give life meaning, yet still, we all seem to suffer some form of boredom. As the horse transcends her stable, do we transcend our own environment? Do we transcend the very world in which we live?
Christians believe so, and the Ascension of Our Lord points to that most definitely.
In descending to us, Our Lord empties Himself of that which would set Him apart from humanity. He becomes limited in ability, in power, in endurance, in duration and in space. Was he ever bored? Given that He wrote in the sand while the Powers-that-be sought to condemn a woman taken in adultery and in doing so seek to discredit His ministry, one might conclude that Our Lord was indeed bored with the interminable legal gnat-straining of those who believed themselves to be the arbiters of knowledge, truth and righteousness. We can only speculate with Our Lord. If He ever was bored, He never showed it and perhaps He was able to work against it.
How? By prayer? That would seem reasonable. If you seek an end to your boredom, you seek to transcend the situation that you're in. Prayer might not cure the boredom, but it might keep it in perspective by giving yourself more fully to the One Who is completely transcendent and, precisely because He is transcendent, is completely immanent.
In ascending, Our Lord is re-clothed with everything that he stripped off in order to be with us. He ascends in His Humanity showing that humanity is not destroyed by ascending. In Our Lord Jesus it is not only possible but it is a fact that Humanity and Divinity can be indivisibly entwined. In ascending Our Lord steps off of the page of the drawing that He drew in order to be present with it without limitation.
In ascending, He offers us the chance too to cease being drawings on the page, but to gain substance, depth, to become more solid and to step off the page in Him. In being with God we find ourselves given a place in His Being, in His substance that can only come from Ascension. This is not just a time of farewell to One Whose love for us gave us redemption, but a demonstration of the Christian's true fate - a gaol-break out from the stable and into Reality itself! And we'll never be bored again!
Showing posts with label Homilies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Homilies. Show all posts
Thursday, May 14, 2015
Friday, December 13, 2013
Signs of Christmas or not?
It's been great to get back to preaching in the college chapel. This is my first homily for a while now. Perhaps there'll be a few more.
Homily preached at Eltham College on 13th
December 2013 on the theme of Advent
Where is the Quiet Zone? Surely you must know or else you’ve
been walking past those blue “You are now entering the quiet zone” signs for a
while. Do you know where they are? Well, what about “No entry at break and
lunchtimes”? That’s a genuine sign here.
When was the last time you saw a “Silence Exams in Progress”
sign? Do you remember, or have they passed you by? What about "Filius patrem honorat"?
It’s amazing how we can just walk past signs without them
registering. Is it because they need to be more exciting?
Do we need the green man at a pelican crossing to do a
little dance before we cross the road? Would we be more observant of a
“Silence, Exams in progress” sign if it jumped in front of us and said “shush”?
Would a “Danger, Men at work” sign be more noticeable if it said “Danger, Miley
Cyrus at work”?
What makes us ignore even some very important signs?
[PAUSE]
The problem is that, as the old saying goes, “familiarity
breeds contempt”. The more we get used to something, the less attention we pay
to it. Since most signs are static, we see them every day and they lose their
impact and their message. This can be problematic when the instruction that the
sign gives is always in force. You might not play your Martin Garrix CD at full
blast in the library, but chances are you’ll forget yourself and hold a loud
conversation much to our librarian's disgust. How many of us miss “Wet, Soap,
Wash, Rinse, dry” and yet complain when we’ve caught a nasty tummy bug?
The signs are there. Why do we miss them?
[PAUSE]
Ironically, there are certain signs that we never miss. When
the night sky is clear in December, we know we are in for frost. When we see
bowties, we know it’s Tuesday. When the marquee goes up in June, we know the
school year is coming to a close. When we hear loud noises and swearing from
the organ bench we know that the organist has got his feet stuck in the organ
pedals again.
So when we see sparkly lights in the window and weirdly
decorated trees and shops full of strangely clothed people singing awful songs
we know either that Lady Gaga is in town or, more likely, that Christmas is
coming. So, of course, we get excited, because Christmas trees mean presents;
fairy lights in windows mean the end of school; the latest Heston Blumenthal
Christmas Cookbook means that sales of Gaviscon will go through the roof come
Boxing Day. All these signs point to Christmas.
Why should they?
What’s to stop us from having twinkly lights in the window
all year round? Why not have a conifer in your living room covered in tinsel on
August 16th? Why not sing “God rest you merry, Gentlemen” all year
round, or use Heston’s latest culinary “creation” when we’d like rather than at
any time of the year? After all, we can have presents at any time, school ends
every Friday evening, and tummy upsets caused by overeating happen all year
round. What stops most of us from behaving like this?
[PAUSE]
Clearly there is a cultural reason for keeping these signs
only at Christmas. It’s something that we just do in our society. There is no
law to prevent us from singing the twelve days of Christmas at the end of year
Chapel service in July. So clearly Christmas must have something special about
it. What is that special thing that is unique to the presence of Christmas?
[PAUSE]
If there is a special thing unique to Christmas, then
Christmas itself must be a sign of that special thing. For Christians, this is
obvious. Christmas Day is the day on which we celebrate the Birth of God in
Human form, the Incarnation of Our Lord Jesus Christ. All this build up, all
these signs point to one thing, the historical reality of Jesus’ birth.
For the Christian, these signs are important because they
point the way towards a God who can now been seen with the human eye. This is
why the season of Advent is so important. It is a season for preparing for an
arrival and we do this by giving things up for Advent, just as we do for Lent.
Some of the stricter Christians even make sure that they do nothing Christmassy
before Christmas so as to keep the time of preparation clear. Advent is a time
of preparation, not just waiting.
But what if you don’t believe in God?
[PAUSE]
If you don’t believe in God, then there is absolutely
nothing special about Christmas at all. There’s nothing to Christmas. It
doesn’t signify anything and it is no different from any other day.
Isn’t it a day to get presents? Well, you can give presents
at any time you wish to anyone you wish.
Isn’t it a day to promote peace and harmony and joy? Well,
shouldn’t you be doing that at all times, anyway?
Isn’t it a holiday? We don’t celebrate the summer holidays
like this, do we?
Isn’t it just social convention? Then why is it always 25th
December? Why not move it to a convenient Thursday every year, like Thanksgiving,
so that it’s more convenient for business?
[PAUSE]
Without Christ, Christmas loses all meaning unless we can
find within our lives some reason why we do what we do. A sign must mean
something, otherwise you might as well forget it.
Look at the signs around you today - and they don't have to be signs sanctioned by the Highway Code. Which of them are truly
meaningless?
Friday, October 12, 2012
Calling the un-tied!
Homily preached at Eltham College on
5th and 12th October 2012 following the Ordination to the
Diaconate.
My first homily to the school after my ordination as Deacon.
It’s that
little voice again.
You, know
the one.
The alarm
clock has just rung
and the little voice is telling you
“stay in bed a little longer,
just a little longer.
You’ve got plenty of time.”
and the little voice is telling you
“stay in bed a little longer,
just a little longer.
You’ve got plenty of time.”
The calling
of that little voice
is very persuasive,
and so another five minutes in bed
seems a perfectly reasonable decision.
is very persuasive,
and so another five minutes in bed
seems a perfectly reasonable decision.
Of course
five minutes easily become half an hour.
When you
realise you’re late, you’re up like a shot.
You’ve
gollopped down your Chocolate Cheerios,
cleaned seven of your teeth,
thus giving the mirror a spray tan with Colgate
and shot out of the house faster than
Prince Harry from the billiards room.
cleaned seven of your teeth,
thus giving the mirror a spray tan with Colgate
and shot out of the house faster than
Prince Harry from the billiards room.
However,
you’ve made it in to the College on time
thus avoiding that disapproving scowl of the Senior Master
reserved especially for latecomers
and detesters of Shakespeare.
thus avoiding that disapproving scowl of the Senior Master
reserved especially for latecomers
and detesters of Shakespeare.
As you catch
sight of yourself
in the reflection on a window,
you notice to your horror
that you’ve forgotten your tie!
in the reflection on a window,
you notice to your horror
that you’ve forgotten your tie!
It goes
without saying
that you happen to bump into each and every member of staff,
each of whom questions you
about your lack of tie.
that you happen to bump into each and every member of staff,
each of whom questions you
about your lack of tie.
Before you
are issued with a spare tie
which looks as if Groundskeeper Willie has used it
to tie up the compost heap to keep it from escaping,
an explanation is demanded of you.
which looks as if Groundskeeper Willie has used it
to tie up the compost heap to keep it from escaping,
an explanation is demanded of you.
What then do
you say?
The lack of a tie always demands an
explanation.
[PAUSE]
Listening to
a call of one of those little voices in your head
can make a major difference to your life.
can make a major difference to your life.
The mind is
a warehouse for the Butterfly effect.
Just
listening to what those voices say
can make the difference between
studying Chemistry at Oxford
and Economics at Warwick,
or even prancing about the stage trying
to impersonate the Rizzle Kicks.
can make the difference between
studying Chemistry at Oxford
and Economics at Warwick,
or even prancing about the stage trying
to impersonate the Rizzle Kicks.
Some perfectly ordinary blokes
even find themselves called to be Deacons
in the Anglican Catholic Church.
even find themselves called to be Deacons
in the Anglican Catholic Church.
[PAUSE]
Called?
Does that
mean the onset of madness, hearing voices?
In some way, we all “hear” voices in our heads
– little chattering things that give us ideas
and suggestions from the depths of our minds.
– little chattering things that give us ideas
and suggestions from the depths of our minds.
We sometimes
find ourselves presented
with strange impulses that seem to come from nowhere.
with strange impulses that seem to come from nowhere.
“Go on, have
a bacon sandwich.”
“Go on, play five more minutes of Assassin’s
Creed.”
“Go on, trip
up Fred as he runs past.”
“Go on, don’t buy Drake’s latest album,
get One Direction’s instead because Harry looks fine.”
get One Direction’s instead because Harry looks fine.”
Some of
these voices do actually give you
good ideas and spur you on to greater things.
good ideas and spur you on to greater things.
“Why not try out for the first XV?”
“Why not Oxbridge?”
“Why not ask for help with your chemistry
homework?”
Indeed, many
people have gone on
to do great things because of listening to
some insistent impulse deep within them.
to do great things because of listening to
some insistent impulse deep within them.
But! Other
voices are less so.
“Why not put off revision to the night before
the exam?”
“Why not stick your finger in the Bunsen
burner?”
“Why not get that tattoo of Harry Styles on
your arm?”
With all this chattering inside it is often
difficult
to separate the good voices from the bad voices,
especially when some voices are making you consider
some of the great choices in your life.
to separate the good voices from the bad voices,
especially when some voices are making you consider
some of the great choices in your life.
There’s no
point in trying for Oxford
if you know in your heart of hearts
you aren’t going to make the grades,
but how do you find out
what’s in your heart of hearts
in the first place?
if you know in your heart of hearts
you aren’t going to make the grades,
but how do you find out
what’s in your heart of hearts
in the first place?
Likewise, if you know that Hockey is your game
and not rugby,
trying out for the first XV might seem rather daft.
and not rugby,
trying out for the first XV might seem rather daft.
Then again, it might be the best decision of
your life!
You need
time to consider what these voices are saying.
There has to be careful listening,
consideration of all the consequences
and whether this decision is right for you.
consideration of all the consequences
and whether this decision is right for you.
For the
Christian,
there is the added belief that God is calling you.
there is the added belief that God is calling you.
For Moses,
the call comes
in the form of a voice from a burning bush.
For the prophet Elijah it is a still, small voice.
in the form of a voice from a burning bush.
For the prophet Elijah it is a still, small voice.
For the Prophet Samuel,
there is a voice calling him in the middle of the night.
there is a voice calling him in the middle of the night.
God’s voice
will be one of the many
that we hear in our lives
but it will not necessarily be a loud call.
that we hear in our lives
but it will not necessarily be a loud call.
It is highly
unlikely that your mobile will ring
and the voice of the Divine will
bellow the answer down the phone.
“Become a Deacon!”
and the voice of the Divine will
bellow the answer down the phone.
“Become a Deacon!”
The fact is
that we are simply not likely to receive
dramatic calls of Biblical proportions.
dramatic calls of Biblical proportions.
We are more
likely to hear our call
in human voices or find an internal sense
of purpose or passion
that convinces us that we are meant to do something.
in human voices or find an internal sense
of purpose or passion
that convinces us that we are meant to do something.
For the
first Christians
such as St Peter, St James and St John,
the call comes from an itinerant Rabbi,
a teacher who was influences the world
with common sense teaching and yet
suffers an agonising death on the cross for it.
such as St Peter, St James and St John,
the call comes from an itinerant Rabbi,
a teacher who was influences the world
with common sense teaching and yet
suffers an agonising death on the cross for it.
St Benedict
is called to transform peoples’ lives
through monasticism and his rule is still used today.
through monasticism and his rule is still used today.
It is St Benedict that we have to thank
for the system of schooling that we have today.
for the system of schooling that we have today.
Blessed
Theresa of Calcutta is called to feed the poor in India
and her work continues long after her death.
and her work continues long after her death.
All of these
receive what they perceive as a call from God.
For each of
them
there is a long period of listening
to the voices around them.
there is a long period of listening
to the voices around them.
[PAUSE]
Like all of
these folk,
you too have decisions to make in your life
based on who you believe yourself to be.
you too have decisions to make in your life
based on who you believe yourself to be.
You will
need to take time and find space
to listen to all the voices that you hear in your life.
to listen to all the voices that you hear in your life.
The ideas
that are good for you will persist.
These are
the voices that are not satisfied
with anything superficial
but create a passion
or a nagging insistence
at the very heart of your being.
with anything superficial
but create a passion
or a nagging insistence
at the very heart of your being.
Your calling
will be something
that will both exhilarate you
and frighten you at the same time,
but it will be something that will transform you
into the person you want to be.
that will both exhilarate you
and frighten you at the same time,
but it will be something that will transform you
into the person you want to be.
Answering
the call takes time,
a good ear,
wise companions,
and much patience.
a good ear,
wise companions,
and much patience.
How exactly
are you going to discern your calling?
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Compensation, fairness and Katy Perry
Admittedly, this was a last minute job after a confusion of dates. Consequently, the Lenten Theme is not obvious, but I believe it's there.
Homily preached at Eltham College on 22nd and 29th February 2012 based on St Matthew xvi.24-26.
Life is unfair.
Yes, that’s a phrase that’s usually accompanied by
a lot of shouting, tears,
a frustrated run upstairs
and a slamming of the door which,
despite rattling the crockery,
taking some plaster off the ceiling into Dad’s tea
and even causing the cat to turn over in its basket,
fails to impress Mum sufficiently
for her to change her mind about
letting you go to the tattoo parlour
to get “I love Labrinth” imprinted on your shoulder.
Well, it might not be quite that exact scenario,
but there are always some rows
that you have with your parents
and all of them will involve some argument
about whether or not you are allowed to do
this that or the other.
Why is it that you’re having these arguments now?
Whose fault is it?
[PAUSE]
Life is unfair.
You’re there at the train station on time.
The train you’re waiting for
arrives at the station
and then decides to carry on past,
fleeing into the distance faster than John Terry
from a Bridge family reunion,
leaving you stranded in the pouring rain.
Twenty minutes later,
you board the next train
only for the announcement that
it’s not going to stop at your station
but the one after.
For what reason, you’re not told.
For all you know
it’s because someone’s
dropped a bottle of Hugo Boss
and the resulting chemical hazard
has closed the platform.
Who knows?
The trains are a law unto themselves.
Whose fault is it that you’re late for school?
What can you do to get those
precious minutes of your education back?
Whom do you blame?
[PAUSE]
Life is unfair.
You fall off your skateboard, landing on your nose,
completely spoiling your good looks
on the same night that you’re
taking Katy Perry out on a date
to console her from the whole
Russell Brand fiasco.
Whom do you blame?
[PAUSE]
Well, whose fault is it?
As soon as you yell that question loudly in your mind,
something truly creepy happens.
Figures begin crawling out of the shadows,
sliding out from under the doors,
oozing their way towards you,
smiling unctuously – all teeth.
As their pallid hands clutch your shoulder,
they whisper in your ear,
“claim compensation!”
[PAUSE]
Claim compensation?
One can debate whether some lawyers
are really out to help you obtain
the highest levels of justice,
genuinely helping those in need,
or whether they are a bunch of ambulance chasers
out to get money from other people’s misery.
Now is that fair?
If you have a family member in a law firm,
you will probably think not.
If you’re in a family who has been damaged by a court case,
you might agree.
What do you think?
[PAUSE]
Life is unfair,
so claim compensation!
How does that sound to you?
Reasonable?
Clearly, it appeals to our sense of justice,
our appreciation of right and wrong.
But what do we really gain
from obtaining compensation?
If we’ve been injured due to someone else’s negligence,
we can’t work anymore.
It seems reasonable that we are given some support
to help us to live,
to cope with our new disability.
If our house has been damaged by someone else,
it seems reasonable to expect some kind of help
in repair and restoration.
If we’ve got to school all soggy and miserable and late,
what compensation could we seek?
“Dear Southeastern trains,
I demand my money back,
a hot towel and an English lesson to replace the one I missed…”
If you’ve gone on your date with Katy Perry
looking like something dredged up from Luxury Comedy,
what good would compensation do you?
“Dear Council,
I demand an instant new nose with which to enchant Miss Perry.”
What compensation do you wish to claim
from your parents for the injury
that you’ve suffered in not being allowed
to sport a tattoo from the Screaming Skull Parlour?
“Dear Parents, I demand payment
for loss of status among my peers…”
“Dear Child of ours, we demand payment
for the lump of plaster that fell off the ceiling
into Dad’s tea during your last rant…”
[PAUSE]
The trouble is that some people get obsessed
with “getting what’s rightfully theirs”.
What does it mean to get what’s rightfully yours?
What do you have a right to?
Do you really know your rights?
What about those in our sister school in Kinsasa?
Do they worry about what’s rightfully theirs?
What about the poor in Calcutta?
[PAUSE]
Why, then, does someone take a council to court
for saying prayers before a meeting?
Because it’s unfair to have Christian values shoved down your throat?
Interesting.
Is it therefore fair that Christians get secular values
like sex before marriage
shoved down their throats?
Ah, but Christians are wrong!
Really?
That’s an assumption that has yet to be proved.
[PAUSE]
Is it fair, that someone who devotes their life
to feeding the poor gets pilloried as a Christian fanatic
and a negative influence to real progress?
That’s what Christopher Hitchens says about Mother Theresa.
Yet, if God does exist, surely she is doing the right thing.
If you’re starving in India,
would you really care about being set free from the ravages of religion
if that very religion is actually putting
a bowl of soup into your hands?
To say that Mother Theresa is wrong
to devote time to promoting Christianity
is to assume that her belief in God was wrong
and that is something that has yet to be proved.
But life is unfair!
[PAUSE]
Mother Theresa cares not one jot about getting what is rightfully hers.
She is concerned only with giving what she has.
After all…
What good is it to demand compensation
and bankrupt a train company?
What good is it to demand payment and lose a friend?
What good is it to demand the ability
to get a tattoo and cause pain to those who really love you?
What good is it to gain the whole world, and to lose your very self?
Surely, it is better to give of yourself,
to write off some of Life’s injustices
in order to grow into a better, more loveable person.
Surely, it is better just to let others get on with
getting their just deserts,
and to live a real life without worrying about things
that are only going to fall apart,
get lost or go mouldy.
Surely, it is better to bear Life’s unfairness
in order to address the real hardship of others.
…and so many of you lot really do.
You’ll run a marathon so that some child
in Africa can get the learning you have.
You’ll embarrass yourself just so that
someone your age has got some where to go away from their abusers.
You’ll fall out of a plane so that
some person can afford an operation.
That’s why you’re brilliant
and so much better than those who will only
lift fingers to help themselves and claim compensation
for every little thing in lives which have lost all meaning.
So what is really unfair in your life?
Are you sure?
Homily preached at Eltham College on 22nd and 29th February 2012 based on St Matthew xvi.24-26.
Life is unfair.
Yes, that’s a phrase that’s usually accompanied by
a lot of shouting, tears,
a frustrated run upstairs
and a slamming of the door which,
despite rattling the crockery,
taking some plaster off the ceiling into Dad’s tea
and even causing the cat to turn over in its basket,
fails to impress Mum sufficiently
for her to change her mind about
letting you go to the tattoo parlour
to get “I love Labrinth” imprinted on your shoulder.
Well, it might not be quite that exact scenario,
but there are always some rows
that you have with your parents
and all of them will involve some argument
about whether or not you are allowed to do
this that or the other.
Why is it that you’re having these arguments now?
Whose fault is it?
[PAUSE]
Life is unfair.
You’re there at the train station on time.
The train you’re waiting for
arrives at the station
and then decides to carry on past,
fleeing into the distance faster than John Terry
from a Bridge family reunion,
leaving you stranded in the pouring rain.
Twenty minutes later,
you board the next train
only for the announcement that
it’s not going to stop at your station
but the one after.
For what reason, you’re not told.
For all you know
it’s because someone’s
dropped a bottle of Hugo Boss
and the resulting chemical hazard
has closed the platform.
Who knows?
The trains are a law unto themselves.
Whose fault is it that you’re late for school?
What can you do to get those
precious minutes of your education back?
Whom do you blame?
[PAUSE]
Life is unfair.
You fall off your skateboard, landing on your nose,
completely spoiling your good looks
on the same night that you’re
taking Katy Perry out on a date
to console her from the whole
Russell Brand fiasco.
Whom do you blame?
[PAUSE]
Well, whose fault is it?
As soon as you yell that question loudly in your mind,
something truly creepy happens.
Figures begin crawling out of the shadows,
sliding out from under the doors,
oozing their way towards you,
smiling unctuously – all teeth.
As their pallid hands clutch your shoulder,
they whisper in your ear,
“claim compensation!”
[PAUSE]
Claim compensation?
One can debate whether some lawyers
are really out to help you obtain
the highest levels of justice,
genuinely helping those in need,
or whether they are a bunch of ambulance chasers
out to get money from other people’s misery.
Now is that fair?
If you have a family member in a law firm,
you will probably think not.
If you’re in a family who has been damaged by a court case,
you might agree.
What do you think?
[PAUSE]
Life is unfair,
so claim compensation!
How does that sound to you?
Reasonable?
Clearly, it appeals to our sense of justice,
our appreciation of right and wrong.
But what do we really gain
from obtaining compensation?
If we’ve been injured due to someone else’s negligence,
we can’t work anymore.
It seems reasonable that we are given some support
to help us to live,
to cope with our new disability.
If our house has been damaged by someone else,
it seems reasonable to expect some kind of help
in repair and restoration.
If we’ve got to school all soggy and miserable and late,
what compensation could we seek?
“Dear Southeastern trains,
I demand my money back,
a hot towel and an English lesson to replace the one I missed…”
If you’ve gone on your date with Katy Perry
looking like something dredged up from Luxury Comedy,
what good would compensation do you?
“Dear Council,
I demand an instant new nose with which to enchant Miss Perry.”
What compensation do you wish to claim
from your parents for the injury
that you’ve suffered in not being allowed
to sport a tattoo from the Screaming Skull Parlour?
“Dear Parents, I demand payment
for loss of status among my peers…”
“Dear Child of ours, we demand payment
for the lump of plaster that fell off the ceiling
into Dad’s tea during your last rant…”
[PAUSE]
The trouble is that some people get obsessed
with “getting what’s rightfully theirs”.
What does it mean to get what’s rightfully yours?
What do you have a right to?
Do you really know your rights?
What about those in our sister school in Kinsasa?
Do they worry about what’s rightfully theirs?
What about the poor in Calcutta?
[PAUSE]
Why, then, does someone take a council to court
for saying prayers before a meeting?
Because it’s unfair to have Christian values shoved down your throat?
Interesting.
Is it therefore fair that Christians get secular values
like sex before marriage
shoved down their throats?
Ah, but Christians are wrong!
Really?
That’s an assumption that has yet to be proved.
[PAUSE]
Is it fair, that someone who devotes their life
to feeding the poor gets pilloried as a Christian fanatic
and a negative influence to real progress?
That’s what Christopher Hitchens says about Mother Theresa.
Yet, if God does exist, surely she is doing the right thing.
If you’re starving in India,
would you really care about being set free from the ravages of religion
if that very religion is actually putting
a bowl of soup into your hands?
To say that Mother Theresa is wrong
to devote time to promoting Christianity
is to assume that her belief in God was wrong
and that is something that has yet to be proved.
But life is unfair!
[PAUSE]
Mother Theresa cares not one jot about getting what is rightfully hers.
She is concerned only with giving what she has.
After all…
What good is it to demand compensation
and bankrupt a train company?
What good is it to demand payment and lose a friend?
What good is it to demand the ability
to get a tattoo and cause pain to those who really love you?
What good is it to gain the whole world, and to lose your very self?
Surely, it is better to give of yourself,
to write off some of Life’s injustices
in order to grow into a better, more loveable person.
Surely, it is better just to let others get on with
getting their just deserts,
and to live a real life without worrying about things
that are only going to fall apart,
get lost or go mouldy.
Surely, it is better to bear Life’s unfairness
in order to address the real hardship of others.
…and so many of you lot really do.
You’ll run a marathon so that some child
in Africa can get the learning you have.
You’ll embarrass yourself just so that
someone your age has got some where to go away from their abusers.
You’ll fall out of a plane so that
some person can afford an operation.
That’s why you’re brilliant
and so much better than those who will only
lift fingers to help themselves and claim compensation
for every little thing in lives which have lost all meaning.
So what is really unfair in your life?
Are you sure?
Wednesday, October 05, 2011
Who's in a name?
Homily preached at Eltham College on 3rd and 4th October based on the second chapter of St Paul’s letter to the Church in Philippi verses 5 to 11.
During your summer holiday,
you meet,
staying in the room next to you,
a woman and her three new triplets.
Of course,
you go all gooey over small babies
so you wander over and say hello.
After the appropriate amount of baby-talk,
the mother introduces her brood by name:
the largest LaFayette,
the middle LaToyah
and the youngest LaTrine.
Latrine?
You can’t quite believe your ears,
have you heard that name correctly?
Latrine?
Isn’t that another word for outside toilet?
Being the polite person that you are,
you ask why that particular name.
The reply?
It sounds nice.
[PAUSE]
How do you feel about your name?
After all, you didn’t choose it for yourself.
It was foisted upon you by your parents.
You may loathe it but,
looking down the school roll,
there isn’t any name that appears
particularly ridiculous.
There are no
Moon Unit Zappas
or Peaches Geldofs,
no Fifi-Trixabelles
or Harper Sevens on the School Roll.
You can always count on the fact
that some parent in the world
is going to inflict
their warped sense of humour
onto the tiny infant
that has just been born to them.
How many boys have received
eleven Christian names
all after the players
for Doncaster Rovers in 1978?
Worse still,
Mr Dover is always going to be tempted
to name his daughter Eileen
– thank about it, Eileen Dover –
or, what about his son Ben?
There’s always the temptation
for Michael Foot to name his daughter Sonya,
and in America,
there is a girl called Deebra Strapp.
Is her son called Jock, one wonders?
If parents can be so rubbish at choosing names should they not hold off until you can choose your own?
[PAUSE]
Well, this would result in you being called “Thingy” or “Doo-dah” or “Wosname” for the first eleven years of your life.
If you are younger than eleven
and you choose your own name,
the result could be just as silly:
Ben 10 Smith,
Pikachu Palmer-Patten
or Kinder Surprise Jones,
for example.
However, if you don’t have a name
until you’re eleven,
you would lack some significant
personal sense of identity.
You may not realise that a name
is a terribly powerful thing.
In Egyptian mythology,
the Goddess Isis gains power
over the Sun-God, Ra,
by discovering his secret name.
In Greek, the word for “name” is onoma,
which itself is derived from
the word nomos meaning “law”,
“principle”, even “authority”.
Your name represents
not just a handy way of referring to you
other than “Oi! Fishface”
but marks you out as a being
in your own right
with a will,
a purpose
and an ability to express
that will and purpose.
Names have an intrinsic meaning.
Jonathan comes from the Hebrew
“Jeho Nathan”
meaning “God has given.”
In Latin that’s Deusdedit
– an early Archbishop of Canterbury,
or in Greek, Theodore.
“William” means a determined protector.
“Robert” means “famed” or “bright”,
the female equivalent is “Clare”.
“Raj” means “King”
as does “Roy” or “Rex”.
Most interesting is the name Joshua.
Joshua is the Hebrew word
meaning “God saves”.
It seems clear that the chap
in the Old Testament
who has a whole book named after him,
is instrumental in saving Israel.
One might say that he is well named.
However,
Joshua was
and still is
a very common name.
If we now translate that name
into Greek we get some inkling
of how powerful a name can be.
So, if Joshua means “God saves”,
what’s the Greek version of Joshua?
[PAUSE]
The answer is, of course, Jesus.
Now think of the impact
of that name on humanity,
whether or not you happen to believe
in who Jesus claims to be.
For many people,
it’s a name so Holy that it needs
to be treated with the profoundest respect
for what they believe Jesus has done
and is doing for them.
For others it’s an expletive
- a word to use when your Xbox bursts into flames.
But, then why should any person’s name
become a swear word?
Would we like our name
to be used as a way of expressing
deep negative emotion?
Doesn’t that cheapen who we are?
Wouldn’t using that name in such a way
count as profound disrespect for that person?
[PAUSE]
This brings us back to the power of names.
We can ruin our good name,
just as Adolph Hitler
and Osama Bin Laden have done.
These names will always be associated with evil,
even if the owners of those names
were nonetheless highly flawed
and vulnerable human beings.
That was their fault,
a result of their choices.
Their acts changed the meanings of their names.
And Christians believe
that Jesus fulfilled the meaning of His name.
What then does this say
about the parent who calls their child
Daisy Boo, or Buddy Bear?
Have these children
been given a name
with which they can be respected?
Have these children been given a name
which they can make great
with works of kindness and hard work?
Surely this demonstrates
that some parents see their children
as fashion accessories
rather than people
with the potential to become great?
It’s going to be hard for
Daisy Boo Oliver to be taken seriously
with a name like that.
Perhaps she has the ability to do just that.
[PAUSE]
Whether or not you love or hate your name,
you still have the potential to make that name good.
You have the ability
to live your lives in such a way
that the mention of your name brings joy or relief
to whoever hears it.
You have the ability
to make the school proud
to have your name on its roll.
You have the ability
to pass on what your name means
not just to your children,
but to all who look up to you for inspiration.
Tough job.
How are you going to do that?
During your summer holiday,
you meet,
staying in the room next to you,
a woman and her three new triplets.
Of course,
you go all gooey over small babies
so you wander over and say hello.
After the appropriate amount of baby-talk,
the mother introduces her brood by name:
the largest LaFayette,
the middle LaToyah
and the youngest LaTrine.
Latrine?
You can’t quite believe your ears,
have you heard that name correctly?
Latrine?
Isn’t that another word for outside toilet?
Being the polite person that you are,
you ask why that particular name.
The reply?
It sounds nice.
[PAUSE]
How do you feel about your name?
After all, you didn’t choose it for yourself.
It was foisted upon you by your parents.
You may loathe it but,
looking down the school roll,
there isn’t any name that appears
particularly ridiculous.
There are no
Moon Unit Zappas
or Peaches Geldofs,
no Fifi-Trixabelles
or Harper Sevens on the School Roll.
You can always count on the fact
that some parent in the world
is going to inflict
their warped sense of humour
onto the tiny infant
that has just been born to them.
How many boys have received
eleven Christian names
all after the players
for Doncaster Rovers in 1978?
Worse still,
Mr Dover is always going to be tempted
to name his daughter Eileen
– thank about it, Eileen Dover –
or, what about his son Ben?
There’s always the temptation
for Michael Foot to name his daughter Sonya,
and in America,
there is a girl called Deebra Strapp.
Is her son called Jock, one wonders?
If parents can be so rubbish at choosing names should they not hold off until you can choose your own?
[PAUSE]
Well, this would result in you being called “Thingy” or “Doo-dah” or “Wosname” for the first eleven years of your life.
If you are younger than eleven
and you choose your own name,
the result could be just as silly:
Ben 10 Smith,
Pikachu Palmer-Patten
or Kinder Surprise Jones,
for example.
However, if you don’t have a name
until you’re eleven,
you would lack some significant
personal sense of identity.
You may not realise that a name
is a terribly powerful thing.
In Egyptian mythology,
the Goddess Isis gains power
over the Sun-God, Ra,
by discovering his secret name.
In Greek, the word for “name” is onoma,
which itself is derived from
the word nomos meaning “law”,
“principle”, even “authority”.
Your name represents
not just a handy way of referring to you
other than “Oi! Fishface”
but marks you out as a being
in your own right
with a will,
a purpose
and an ability to express
that will and purpose.
Names have an intrinsic meaning.
Jonathan comes from the Hebrew
“Jeho Nathan”
meaning “God has given.”
In Latin that’s Deusdedit
– an early Archbishop of Canterbury,
or in Greek, Theodore.
“William” means a determined protector.
“Robert” means “famed” or “bright”,
the female equivalent is “Clare”.
“Raj” means “King”
as does “Roy” or “Rex”.
Most interesting is the name Joshua.
Joshua is the Hebrew word
meaning “God saves”.
It seems clear that the chap
in the Old Testament
who has a whole book named after him,
is instrumental in saving Israel.
One might say that he is well named.
However,
Joshua was
and still is
a very common name.
If we now translate that name
into Greek we get some inkling
of how powerful a name can be.
So, if Joshua means “God saves”,
what’s the Greek version of Joshua?
[PAUSE]
The answer is, of course, Jesus.
Now think of the impact
of that name on humanity,
whether or not you happen to believe
in who Jesus claims to be.
For many people,
it’s a name so Holy that it needs
to be treated with the profoundest respect
for what they believe Jesus has done
and is doing for them.
For others it’s an expletive
- a word to use when your Xbox bursts into flames.
But, then why should any person’s name
become a swear word?
Would we like our name
to be used as a way of expressing
deep negative emotion?
Doesn’t that cheapen who we are?
Wouldn’t using that name in such a way
count as profound disrespect for that person?
[PAUSE]
This brings us back to the power of names.
We can ruin our good name,
just as Adolph Hitler
and Osama Bin Laden have done.
These names will always be associated with evil,
even if the owners of those names
were nonetheless highly flawed
and vulnerable human beings.
That was their fault,
a result of their choices.
Their acts changed the meanings of their names.
And Christians believe
that Jesus fulfilled the meaning of His name.
What then does this say
about the parent who calls their child
Daisy Boo, or Buddy Bear?
Have these children
been given a name
with which they can be respected?
Have these children been given a name
which they can make great
with works of kindness and hard work?
Surely this demonstrates
that some parents see their children
as fashion accessories
rather than people
with the potential to become great?
It’s going to be hard for
Daisy Boo Oliver to be taken seriously
with a name like that.
Perhaps she has the ability to do just that.
[PAUSE]
Whether or not you love or hate your name,
you still have the potential to make that name good.
You have the ability
to live your lives in such a way
that the mention of your name brings joy or relief
to whoever hears it.
You have the ability
to make the school proud
to have your name on its roll.
You have the ability
to pass on what your name means
not just to your children,
but to all who look up to you for inspiration.
Tough job.
How are you going to do that?
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Same old same old
I can't tell you how glad I was to be able to start preaching again after so long a drought. I may not be licensed. I may not even regard myself as within the jurisdiction of the Church of England, but I am still a Reader. This is my first since leaving the C of E, directed, as usual, to the students.
Homily preached at Eltham College on 9th and 10th May 2011, based on Ecclesiastes i.1-11
Are you looking forward
to a nice new school day?
Are you ready and energised
for a fun seven or eight hours of learning?
Are you all excited
at the prospect of double maths
and all those exercises and problems
you’re going to be set?
Are you looking forward
to learning all the tenses,
moods and participles
of the word agere in Latin?
What about all that homework tonight?
Looking forward to it?
Why not?
Perhaps there’s something better for you
to be doing with your time?
Let’s think...
A World of Warcraft tournament,
perhaps, for the whole school?
That would be fun, wouldn’t it?
Watching your history master
and your geography master
battling Deathwing the Destroyer
in an instance on Mount Hyjal,
before crushing them
both yourself with a horde of Night-Elves.
We could start immediately after chapel
and go through til midnight?
Yes?
That would be fun!
And you wouldn’t get bored with that, now,
would you?
That might be fun for today,
but what about tomorrow?
A whole school Talent Contest, like the X-factor?
Not the fiddly little one
we had a while ago,
which was obviously rigged
when the head boy won,
This time, everyone takes part.
Just think how brilliant it would be
with the Deputy Head
doing Tiny Tempur’s Pass Out
and the English masters
wailing their ways through
the collected works of Lady Gaga,
dressed appropriately with a wardrobe
provided by Ginsters.
Yes, all 800 or so of us
would have to take part
and it would take about 2 days
to get through them all without a break,
but it would be fun.
It wouldn’t get boring, would it?
And instead of the usual meals in the Refectory,
we could have pizza every day
for all the years that you’re here.
Cola on tap, et c. That wouldn’t get boring would it?
[PAUSE]
You’re obviously very aware
how easily the novelty wears off.
When you started at here,
you were no doubt excited
and a little bit frightened as
to what would happen next.
All these new sensations,
all these new sights, sounds and,
if you’re walking through the Chemistry department,
smells were part
of this new wonderful school.
But how do you feel about it now?
Do you find it boring?
[PAUSE]
The feeling of boredom
is quite unmistakable,
and you probably have
your own experiences to describe it.
It’s that sensation of really not wanting
to be where you are now,
wanting to do anything else
other than be forced to sit there
in some task which you perceive
as being quite meaningless
or difficult or annoying.
You feel trapped and restless
and your attention hurtles about
like a Justin Bieber fan after 10 cups of coffee,
searching desperately
for something better to latch onto.
Finally, your eyes settle onto the clock:
10:09 and 30 seconds,
10:09 and 31 seconds… 32,…. 33…
32… 31… 30…
31,... 32… 35… 36… 37…
24… 23…
Curse you, Second Hand!
Ah! Zeno has got nothing
on a bored schoolboy waiting for Break.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself
why you get bored in the first place?
[PAUSE]
Surprisingly, that’s not an easy question to answer.
You really have to think hard
about why you’re finding something
boring in the first place.
Let’s say you find maths boring.
Patently ridiculous, but let’s pretend.
Why might this be?
The most common reason
is that you are stuck
and don’t know what to do now.
Your boredom is then a symptom of frustration.
The second most common reason
is that you’ve managed
to understand what to do
quickly and easily after the first 3 questions,
your boredom then is a result of an intelligent mind
seeking some stimulation.
The first point is easy to deal with,
with a raising of the hand
and a polite request to your teacher.
The second is much more subtle.
[PAUSE]
Without exception,
you are all intelligent beings,
and intelligence requires something to nourish it
– sights, sounds, ideas, challenges,
arguments and mysteries
– for it to thrive.
Just like our bodies,
our minds require a balanced diet
in order to function properly.
If we fill our minds with junk,
then junk is all they’ll crave
and junk is all that’ll come out of them.
A daily diet of four hours
of World of Warcraft
is equivalent to a daily intake
of Big Macs, Hot Wings, and Stuffed Crusts
all washed down with a gallon of Galaxy Crushem.
If the desire for entertainment
is causing us to question the benefits
of interacting in a classroom,
absorbing information
and practising our intellectual skills,
then it is clear that our minds are not
as healthy as they could be.
[PAUSE]
Boredom is a part of everybody’s life.
It’s even mentioned in the Bible,
especially in the book of Ecclesiastes.
For the Christian,
boredom is a sign to reflect on who we are
and to contrast that with God who,
while never-changing can always present Himself
in ever new ways through
the same prayers,
the same readings
and the same silences.
Whether Christian or not,
to face up to boredom is to face up to
the possibility of the transformation of our lives,
to become someone even better.
Indeed, boredom can teach us
a great deal about ourselves,
about who we are
and contrast that with the people
that we are meant to be.
Facing up to tedious chores
can make us better people
if we learn to control our desire to give up
and find something more interesting.
[PAUSE}
Just look at the day ahead of you.
What do you think is going to be boring?
How is that going to change your life for the better?
Homily preached at Eltham College on 9th and 10th May 2011, based on Ecclesiastes i.1-11
Are you looking forward
to a nice new school day?
Are you ready and energised
for a fun seven or eight hours of learning?
Are you all excited
at the prospect of double maths
and all those exercises and problems
you’re going to be set?
Are you looking forward
to learning all the tenses,
moods and participles
of the word agere in Latin?
What about all that homework tonight?
Looking forward to it?
Why not?
Perhaps there’s something better for you
to be doing with your time?
Let’s think...
A World of Warcraft tournament,
perhaps, for the whole school?
That would be fun, wouldn’t it?
Watching your history master
and your geography master
battling Deathwing the Destroyer
in an instance on Mount Hyjal,
before crushing them
both yourself with a horde of Night-Elves.
We could start immediately after chapel
and go through til midnight?
Yes?
That would be fun!
And you wouldn’t get bored with that, now,
would you?
That might be fun for today,
but what about tomorrow?
A whole school Talent Contest, like the X-factor?
Not the fiddly little one
we had a while ago,
which was obviously rigged
when the head boy won,
This time, everyone takes part.
Just think how brilliant it would be
with the Deputy Head
doing Tiny Tempur’s Pass Out
and the English masters
wailing their ways through
the collected works of Lady Gaga,
dressed appropriately with a wardrobe
provided by Ginsters.
Yes, all 800 or so of us
would have to take part
and it would take about 2 days
to get through them all without a break,
but it would be fun.
It wouldn’t get boring, would it?
And instead of the usual meals in the Refectory,
we could have pizza every day
for all the years that you’re here.
Cola on tap, et c. That wouldn’t get boring would it?
[PAUSE]
You’re obviously very aware
how easily the novelty wears off.
When you started at here,
you were no doubt excited
and a little bit frightened as
to what would happen next.
All these new sensations,
all these new sights, sounds and,
if you’re walking through the Chemistry department,
smells were part
of this new wonderful school.
But how do you feel about it now?
Do you find it boring?
[PAUSE]
The feeling of boredom
is quite unmistakable,
and you probably have
your own experiences to describe it.
It’s that sensation of really not wanting
to be where you are now,
wanting to do anything else
other than be forced to sit there
in some task which you perceive
as being quite meaningless
or difficult or annoying.
You feel trapped and restless
and your attention hurtles about
like a Justin Bieber fan after 10 cups of coffee,
searching desperately
for something better to latch onto.
Finally, your eyes settle onto the clock:
10:09 and 30 seconds,
10:09 and 31 seconds… 32,…. 33…
32… 31… 30…
31,... 32… 35… 36… 37…
24… 23…
Curse you, Second Hand!
Ah! Zeno has got nothing
on a bored schoolboy waiting for Break.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself
why you get bored in the first place?
[PAUSE]
Surprisingly, that’s not an easy question to answer.
You really have to think hard
about why you’re finding something
boring in the first place.
Let’s say you find maths boring.
Patently ridiculous, but let’s pretend.
Why might this be?
The most common reason
is that you are stuck
and don’t know what to do now.
Your boredom is then a symptom of frustration.
The second most common reason
is that you’ve managed
to understand what to do
quickly and easily after the first 3 questions,
your boredom then is a result of an intelligent mind
seeking some stimulation.
The first point is easy to deal with,
with a raising of the hand
and a polite request to your teacher.
The second is much more subtle.
[PAUSE]
Without exception,
you are all intelligent beings,
and intelligence requires something to nourish it
– sights, sounds, ideas, challenges,
arguments and mysteries
– for it to thrive.
Just like our bodies,
our minds require a balanced diet
in order to function properly.
If we fill our minds with junk,
then junk is all they’ll crave
and junk is all that’ll come out of them.
A daily diet of four hours
of World of Warcraft
is equivalent to a daily intake
of Big Macs, Hot Wings, and Stuffed Crusts
all washed down with a gallon of Galaxy Crushem.
If the desire for entertainment
is causing us to question the benefits
of interacting in a classroom,
absorbing information
and practising our intellectual skills,
then it is clear that our minds are not
as healthy as they could be.
[PAUSE]
Boredom is a part of everybody’s life.
It’s even mentioned in the Bible,
especially in the book of Ecclesiastes.
For the Christian,
boredom is a sign to reflect on who we are
and to contrast that with God who,
while never-changing can always present Himself
in ever new ways through
the same prayers,
the same readings
and the same silences.
Whether Christian or not,
to face up to boredom is to face up to
the possibility of the transformation of our lives,
to become someone even better.
Indeed, boredom can teach us
a great deal about ourselves,
about who we are
and contrast that with the people
that we are meant to be.
Facing up to tedious chores
can make us better people
if we learn to control our desire to give up
and find something more interesting.
[PAUSE}
Just look at the day ahead of you.
What do you think is going to be boring?
How is that going to change your life for the better?
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
Christmas, Desire and Zigazig-a
Homily preached at Eltham College on 24th November 2010 based on St Matthew iv.1-4
Is there anyone here
who doesn’t know
what they want for Christmas?
Surely, by now,
you’ll have written down your hearts’ desires
for 25th December
in letters to Father Christmas
and addressed them to his home
in Lapland.
It’s a shame they won’t reach him really.
Everyone knows he lives at the North Pole.
So what did you ask for?
BioShock or Fallout 3?
The latest from Kings of Leon
or Taylor Swift?
The Nike ACG Wild Edge GTX trainers?
Some members of the sixth form
have asked for the Fisher Price
Bounce and Spin Zebra.
The list of desired Christmas presents seems endless!
So think now.
What do you want for Christmas?
Are you sure?
Is that what you really want?
The trouble is, you might just get it.
[PAUSE]
In 1996, five young women
asked that very same question.
Yo, I'll tell you what I want,
what I really, really want,So tell me what you want,
what you really, really want,I'll tell you what I want,
what I really, really want,So tell me what you want,
what you really, really want,I wanna, I wanna,
I wanna, I wanna,
I wanna really really really wanna
zigazig ha.
Popular opinion at the time
thought that what they
really, really wanted was a slap.
14 years of scouring
modern languages
from Sanskrit to Xhosa
as well as hours and hours
on Urban Dictionary.com
have turned up nothing,
absolutely nothing,
to shed light on what this
Zigazig-a actually is.
However, the Spice Girls
do make a very good point.
Do you really know what
you really, really want in life?
Are you able to express it?
[PAUSE]
We might want those
Nike Wild Edge Trainers,
but what about when we’ve got them?
We might want to be drinking
ice-cold cola,
eating the finest Krispy Kreme donuts
while sitting in a hot tub with the Saturdays.
But what about when the water gets cold,
the donuts have gone,
and the Saturdays have turned into
the Happy Mondays?
What have you really gained?
Did you really want those
trainers in the first place?
You know they are going to wear out
and be no more use than
the £10 trainers from George at Asda.
You can see that you get your trainers,
but in some way
your want doesn’t go away.
Once you’ve got what you want,
the want is still there.
So what is it that you want?
Can you identify what
you’re really missing in life?
[PAUSE]
It has to be admitted
that we are terribly fortunate in the West.
In fact we are spoiled rotten.
Anything we could possibly want,
there’s an outlet for it.
Perhaps that’s the problem:
we don’t really want
what we think we want,
and before we’ve found out
what we really want in life,
we’ve been distracted from it
by the comforting glow of a tactical nuke
in COD.
We don’t know what we want
because something bright
and shiny takes our mind off it.
So how do we find out what we really want?
Well, let’s take those trainers for example.
Why do we want them?
Because they’re state of the art.
Why does that matter?
Because they’re the best.
Why won’t the £10 trainers from Asda’s do?
Because they’re cheap.
But they’ll do the job won’t they?
But they’re not as nice (or siiick).
Why does that matter?
All my friends’ trainers are nice…
Before we know it,
we’ve discovered that
we believe that having the right trainers
makes us somehow socially acceptable
- a better person.
It reveals our need
to be accepted and loved,
and that we are willing
to sacrifice being who we really are to get it.
So by allowing trainers to tell us
who to be friends with,
we’ve actually completely missed
what we really want in life
– a group of good friends.
Real friends are worth more than trainers, aren’t they?
[PAUSE]
Of course,
you now realise that this changes the situation.
If we want good friends,
we need to be a good friend.
If we want to be accepted,
then we have to accept others.
If we want to learn,
then we need to study
and help people to study
in order to let them teach us.
In short, we have to do unto others
as we would want them to do to us.
St Francis reminds us that
we should not seek so much as to be loved
as to love.
We have to love first before we receive love.
Often that’s very hard
and takes a long time to achieve.
However, then we get
what we’ve worked hard for
and it is more satisfying than a pair of trainers
that will only end up smelling worse
than a long-dead fish wearing Hugo Boss.
St Augustine goes further
and suggests that all human want
is at heart the search for God.
He says to God,
“Thou hast formed us for Thyself,
and our hearts are restless
till they find rest in Thee.”
For St Augustine,
as water satisfies our thirst,
and food our hunger,
so does God satisfy any real want
that we have.
[PAUSE]
It’s true
we have to look very hard at ourselves
to discover what we really want
to have or do in life.
Each of us has something to offer others
and what we have to offer
will come out of trying to understand
our loneliness,
our sadness
and our confusion in life.
Finding out
what we really want in life
will tell us lots about who we are,
and will help us to get what we really want,
if we are prepared to look out
for what other people around us need too.
What do you want for Christmas?
Are you sure?
Is there anyone here
who doesn’t know
what they want for Christmas?
Surely, by now,
you’ll have written down your hearts’ desires
for 25th December
in letters to Father Christmas
and addressed them to his home
in Lapland.
It’s a shame they won’t reach him really.
Everyone knows he lives at the North Pole.
So what did you ask for?
BioShock or Fallout 3?
The latest from Kings of Leon
or Taylor Swift?
The Nike ACG Wild Edge GTX trainers?
Some members of the sixth form
have asked for the Fisher Price
Bounce and Spin Zebra.
The list of desired Christmas presents seems endless!
So think now.
What do you want for Christmas?
Are you sure?
Is that what you really want?
The trouble is, you might just get it.
[PAUSE]
In 1996, five young women
asked that very same question.
Yo, I'll tell you what I want,
what I really, really want,So tell me what you want,
what you really, really want,I'll tell you what I want,
what I really, really want,So tell me what you want,
what you really, really want,I wanna, I wanna,
I wanna, I wanna,
I wanna really really really wanna
zigazig ha.
Popular opinion at the time
thought that what they
really, really wanted was a slap.
14 years of scouring
modern languages
from Sanskrit to Xhosa
as well as hours and hours
on Urban Dictionary.com
have turned up nothing,
absolutely nothing,
to shed light on what this
Zigazig-a actually is.
However, the Spice Girls
do make a very good point.
Do you really know what
you really, really want in life?
Are you able to express it?
[PAUSE]
We might want those
Nike Wild Edge Trainers,
but what about when we’ve got them?
We might want to be drinking
ice-cold cola,
eating the finest Krispy Kreme donuts
while sitting in a hot tub with the Saturdays.
But what about when the water gets cold,
the donuts have gone,
and the Saturdays have turned into
the Happy Mondays?
What have you really gained?
Did you really want those
trainers in the first place?
You know they are going to wear out
and be no more use than
the £10 trainers from George at Asda.
You can see that you get your trainers,
but in some way
your want doesn’t go away.
Once you’ve got what you want,
the want is still there.
So what is it that you want?
Can you identify what
you’re really missing in life?
[PAUSE]
It has to be admitted
that we are terribly fortunate in the West.
In fact we are spoiled rotten.
Anything we could possibly want,
there’s an outlet for it.
Perhaps that’s the problem:
we don’t really want
what we think we want,
and before we’ve found out
what we really want in life,
we’ve been distracted from it
by the comforting glow of a tactical nuke
in COD.
We don’t know what we want
because something bright
and shiny takes our mind off it.
So how do we find out what we really want?
Well, let’s take those trainers for example.
Why do we want them?
Because they’re state of the art.
Why does that matter?
Because they’re the best.
Why won’t the £10 trainers from Asda’s do?
Because they’re cheap.
But they’ll do the job won’t they?
But they’re not as nice (or siiick).
Why does that matter?
All my friends’ trainers are nice…
Before we know it,
we’ve discovered that
we believe that having the right trainers
makes us somehow socially acceptable
- a better person.
It reveals our need
to be accepted and loved,
and that we are willing
to sacrifice being who we really are to get it.
So by allowing trainers to tell us
who to be friends with,
we’ve actually completely missed
what we really want in life
– a group of good friends.
Real friends are worth more than trainers, aren’t they?
[PAUSE]
Of course,
you now realise that this changes the situation.
If we want good friends,
we need to be a good friend.
If we want to be accepted,
then we have to accept others.
If we want to learn,
then we need to study
and help people to study
in order to let them teach us.
In short, we have to do unto others
as we would want them to do to us.
St Francis reminds us that
we should not seek so much as to be loved
as to love.
We have to love first before we receive love.
Often that’s very hard
and takes a long time to achieve.
However, then we get
what we’ve worked hard for
and it is more satisfying than a pair of trainers
that will only end up smelling worse
than a long-dead fish wearing Hugo Boss.
St Augustine goes further
and suggests that all human want
is at heart the search for God.
He says to God,
“Thou hast formed us for Thyself,
and our hearts are restless
till they find rest in Thee.”
For St Augustine,
as water satisfies our thirst,
and food our hunger,
so does God satisfy any real want
that we have.
[PAUSE]
It’s true
we have to look very hard at ourselves
to discover what we really want
to have or do in life.
Each of us has something to offer others
and what we have to offer
will come out of trying to understand
our loneliness,
our sadness
and our confusion in life.
Finding out
what we really want in life
will tell us lots about who we are,
and will help us to get what we really want,
if we are prepared to look out
for what other people around us need too.
What do you want for Christmas?
Are you sure?
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Struggling with struggling
Homily preached on 21st September 2010 at Eltham College based on Genesis xxxii.19-30
Jubilation!
Nick, Martyn, Jo and Gabby
are dancing around,
clapping and cheering,
the like of which has not been seen
since the invention of the McFlurry.
Gerrard, of course,
is sitting grumbling into his coffee,
whilst trying to handle the disappointment
and the ribbing from the others.
Jon watches on,
completely bemused by this behaviour.
Of course,
it helps to know that the date
is 12th September 2005
and Gerrard is an Australian.
How many of you can explain this?
[PAUSE]
Jon turns to Nick.
“So what’s happened, then?”
Silence falls suddenly,
like a dropped bowl of porridge.
A cold breeze whirls around the office;
a tumbleweed rolls abjectly by.
In the distance, a bell tolls sullenly.
“Where have you been
for the last 3 months?
England have just won the Ashes!”
“Ah,” says Jon,
“is that better than or worse
than the wooden spoon?”
“What?”
“Well, we obviously didn’t get
gold, silver or bronze.
So we were in the bottom two, yes?”
“What are you talking about?
Do you even know what sport this is?”
“I assume Rugby since Gerrard isn’t looking too happy.”
There follow some interesting words and phrases
designed to demonstrate to Jon that
perhaps he ought to pay a little more attention
to the folk chasing
a hard, leather object
around a field in front of
two little wooden edifices
resembling structures
one would usually find in a prehistoric henge.
[PAUSE]
It’s a strange life when you simply
don’t understand the fuss about sport.
Why is it that people get cross
when you don’t know
how many runs there are in a wicket;
or why baseball is not the same as rounders;
or why the referee in a football match
never gets snogged after a goal is scored?
For the non-sportsman,
the exultation and elation of a win
and the misery
and almost physical pain of a defeat
can seem as relevant as
an acute accent in physics.
If Manchester United lose
to Bishop Stortford at bowls,
it’s just hard to care.
Heresy, you may say!
Is there any common ground
for the Athlete and the non-Athlete?
[PAUSE]
Of course there’s plenty of common ground:
music,
school,
the fear that you’ll end up
like one of the contestants
in “Young, Dumb and Living off Mum”
However there is a common ground
that runs deeper than that.
Indeed it is common
not just to humanity
but to all forms of life.
For every form of life,
there are three certainties:
Life, Death and Competition.
All life is in competition with itself
for some resource:
usually dinner,
trying not to be dinner
and sex.
The vast majority of animals
die in their virginity
usually by suffocation
complicated by digestion
–they get eaten when they’re young.
There is not a day in the life of any organism
without some titanic battle just to stay alive.
All this seems a far cry from the hockey court,
doesn’t it?
Does this really apply to human beings?
[PAUSE]
Well, of course and you know that.
But how aware are you
of the struggles that you are facing each day?
We’re not talking about
realising that you have the ball
and the larger lads in the rugby squad
are thundering towards you
like belligerent wasps
to a discarded Curly-Wurly.
If you think about it,
we’re engaged in a struggle
with every other human being we meet
– not all the time –
but at some point.
If we’re all different people - individuals,
then at some point
we’re going to disagree somewhere.
The struggle then is
how do we live peaceably alongside people
who differ from us in many ways?
If we take a purely sporting view,
then we can attribute
win, lose or draw to every struggle.
Trouble is,
in so doing, we miss vital information
about ourselves and whom we are opposing.
Rudyard Kipling reminds us
that “winning” and “losing”
are imposters,
merely superficial labels
that we stick on the outcomes
of our struggles.
In the grand scheme of things
there are no such things
as win, lose or draw.
[PAUSE]
Christians believe that a careful review of
what it means “to win”
is of paramount importance.
If we win,
we need to interpret that win
in the light of what we have struggled to do,
and consider its impact
on the people around us.
A win that does not
take the wellbeing of others into account
is selfish and,
in the long-run,
likely to prove to be a loss.
If we lose,
then we need only
to regard it as a true defeat
if our struggle has given us
something of less worth
than what we have struggled for.
Often,
what we gain from “losing” is bigger
and better than what we are trying to win.
The cross of Christ may be seen as a defeat
in the eyes of the world.
To the Christian, it is more than a victory.
It is how we struggle
and compete that makes us truly human beings,
not what we achieve
or fail to achieve.
To the Christian,
“winning” is about finding the meaning
of our lives in the context of living with God.
The non-Christians too must reflect on
what goals they have set for their lives.
These are struggles which
we meet day to day,
and we deal with them
according to our religion.
[PAUSE]
All of you will see struggles this year.
You all have public exams to take
which will make big influences
in your lives to come.
You may see this as a worry;
you may not even know
which goals you are aiming for;
but, your experiences in sport
have taught you that
there is a bigger picture.
You have a team to support you,
coaches to guide you
and the lessons in life
that you have already learned.
Your struggles are not worth nothing,
indeed, whatever difficulties you face in life,
it is how you approach them
which will show who you really are.
You have already achieved much of worth,
and you have many more brilliant achievements
ahead of you,
but what system of scoring are you using?
Jubilation!
Nick, Martyn, Jo and Gabby
are dancing around,
clapping and cheering,
the like of which has not been seen
since the invention of the McFlurry.
Gerrard, of course,
is sitting grumbling into his coffee,
whilst trying to handle the disappointment
and the ribbing from the others.
Jon watches on,
completely bemused by this behaviour.
Of course,
it helps to know that the date
is 12th September 2005
and Gerrard is an Australian.
How many of you can explain this?
[PAUSE]
Jon turns to Nick.
“So what’s happened, then?”
Silence falls suddenly,
like a dropped bowl of porridge.
A cold breeze whirls around the office;
a tumbleweed rolls abjectly by.
In the distance, a bell tolls sullenly.
“Where have you been
for the last 3 months?
England have just won the Ashes!”
“Ah,” says Jon,
“is that better than or worse
than the wooden spoon?”
“What?”
“Well, we obviously didn’t get
gold, silver or bronze.
So we were in the bottom two, yes?”
“What are you talking about?
Do you even know what sport this is?”
“I assume Rugby since Gerrard isn’t looking too happy.”
There follow some interesting words and phrases
designed to demonstrate to Jon that
perhaps he ought to pay a little more attention
to the folk chasing
a hard, leather object
around a field in front of
two little wooden edifices
resembling structures
one would usually find in a prehistoric henge.
[PAUSE]
It’s a strange life when you simply
don’t understand the fuss about sport.
Why is it that people get cross
when you don’t know
how many runs there are in a wicket;
or why baseball is not the same as rounders;
or why the referee in a football match
never gets snogged after a goal is scored?
For the non-sportsman,
the exultation and elation of a win
and the misery
and almost physical pain of a defeat
can seem as relevant as
an acute accent in physics.
If Manchester United lose
to Bishop Stortford at bowls,
it’s just hard to care.
Heresy, you may say!
Is there any common ground
for the Athlete and the non-Athlete?
[PAUSE]
Of course there’s plenty of common ground:
music,
school,
the fear that you’ll end up
like one of the contestants
in “Young, Dumb and Living off Mum”
However there is a common ground
that runs deeper than that.
Indeed it is common
not just to humanity
but to all forms of life.
For every form of life,
there are three certainties:
Life, Death and Competition.
All life is in competition with itself
for some resource:
usually dinner,
trying not to be dinner
and sex.
The vast majority of animals
die in their virginity
usually by suffocation
complicated by digestion
–they get eaten when they’re young.
There is not a day in the life of any organism
without some titanic battle just to stay alive.
All this seems a far cry from the hockey court,
doesn’t it?
Does this really apply to human beings?
[PAUSE]
Well, of course and you know that.
But how aware are you
of the struggles that you are facing each day?
We’re not talking about
realising that you have the ball
and the larger lads in the rugby squad
are thundering towards you
like belligerent wasps
to a discarded Curly-Wurly.
If you think about it,
we’re engaged in a struggle
with every other human being we meet
– not all the time –
but at some point.
If we’re all different people - individuals,
then at some point
we’re going to disagree somewhere.
The struggle then is
how do we live peaceably alongside people
who differ from us in many ways?
If we take a purely sporting view,
then we can attribute
win, lose or draw to every struggle.
Trouble is,
in so doing, we miss vital information
about ourselves and whom we are opposing.
Rudyard Kipling reminds us
that “winning” and “losing”
are imposters,
merely superficial labels
that we stick on the outcomes
of our struggles.
In the grand scheme of things
there are no such things
as win, lose or draw.
[PAUSE]
Christians believe that a careful review of
what it means “to win”
is of paramount importance.
If we win,
we need to interpret that win
in the light of what we have struggled to do,
and consider its impact
on the people around us.
A win that does not
take the wellbeing of others into account
is selfish and,
in the long-run,
likely to prove to be a loss.
If we lose,
then we need only
to regard it as a true defeat
if our struggle has given us
something of less worth
than what we have struggled for.
Often,
what we gain from “losing” is bigger
and better than what we are trying to win.
The cross of Christ may be seen as a defeat
in the eyes of the world.
To the Christian, it is more than a victory.
It is how we struggle
and compete that makes us truly human beings,
not what we achieve
or fail to achieve.
To the Christian,
“winning” is about finding the meaning
of our lives in the context of living with God.
The non-Christians too must reflect on
what goals they have set for their lives.
These are struggles which
we meet day to day,
and we deal with them
according to our religion.
[PAUSE]
All of you will see struggles this year.
You all have public exams to take
which will make big influences
in your lives to come.
You may see this as a worry;
you may not even know
which goals you are aiming for;
but, your experiences in sport
have taught you that
there is a bigger picture.
You have a team to support you,
coaches to guide you
and the lessons in life
that you have already learned.
Your struggles are not worth nothing,
indeed, whatever difficulties you face in life,
it is how you approach them
which will show who you really are.
You have already achieved much of worth,
and you have many more brilliant achievements
ahead of you,
but what system of scoring are you using?
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
Oremus
Homily preached at Eltham College on 1st and 2nd March 2010 based on St Luke xi.1-11.
Let us pray.
[PAUSE for shuffling]
Interesting!
Why did you do that?
All that shuffling and shifting in your seat,
making the benches creak and groan
like an oak tree during
the elephant nesting season.
It’s an automatic response,
a ceremony, that when someone says
“Let us pray”, everyone slumps forward
in their seat.
Does that mean that
you’ve all been hypnotised
so that when the phrase “let us pray” is uttered,
you are to believe that your spines
have turned to rice pudding?
Of course not.
That’s the way you’ve been taught to pray
– bowing your head,
putting your hands together
and perhaps closing your eyes.
And what is it that you do when you pray?
[PAUSE]
It must be difficult
if you don’t believe in God.
What do you do when others are praying?
Sit there and think,
“Oh do come on, you’re boring me silly?”
or does your mind wander
to what you have to do today:
beat year 10 to
the Krispy Kreme Doughnut sale,
create foul and pungent aromas in Chemistry
that will strip the paint off of the walls
as far as D/T
or find 100 different chat-up lines
to entice Pixie Lott out on a date with you.
Perhaps actually, you do pray.
“Please God,
let me launch a nuke tonight in COD.”
“Please God,
let there be a chocolate-covered doughnut left.”
“Please God,
don’t let the test on the subjunctive
be today.”
“Please God,
make Pixie Lott drive by in the limo,
get a puncture have to stop by the school,
just as I am there.
Please help me to lift the car up by one hand
whilst changing the wheel with my teeth,
so that she’ll think I’m hench
and thus want to go on a date with me.”
And what do you suppose
God’s reactions to these prayers are?
[PAUSE]
Perhaps you pray the prayer
that’s being prayed out loud.
Try this one for size,
and this time focus on the prayer itself.
Let us pray.
Prevent us, O Lord, in all our doings
with thy most gracious favour,
and further us with thy continual help;
that in all our works,
begun,
continued,
and ended in thee,
we may glorify thy holy Name,
and finally by thy mercy
obtain everlasting life;
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Oh dear, back to Miss Lott again were we?
If your mind was wandering during that,
don’t worry,
it even happens to the professionals!
St Augustine even moans about
his mind wandering.
But he uses the words
to focus his mind back to prayer.
If, however, all your prayer consists of is
“Please God let me able to do such and such”
and
“Please God make whosits to do blank”
then you are missing the point of prayer.
Yes, prayer is about communicating with God.
How is presenting God
with a shopping list of your requirements
communication?
Are our prayers reducing God
to the level of the Genie of the Lamp,
a being whose only purpose
is to do what we want?
[PAUSE]
So just how should we pray?
One of the disciples asks Jesus the very same question.
He replies with the Lord’s Prayer.
Now that's a homily on it's own!
While some of us know this prayer off by heart,
others of us don’t.
It’s worth looking at it carefully by yourself,
because in it we find that prayer
isn’t just about asking for help
with the problems in our lives, small or great.
It’s about asking for help to live life
with God
in a very personal and intimate relationship
despite the problems that life throws at us.
The Lord Jesus goes on to say that
God does actually know
both what we want
and what we really need
before we even ask Him.
The point is that we recognise His existence
as a figure who cares.
By asking Him for things in prayer,
we recognise that we need Him.
You might think of this as grovelling.
As Monty Python would say
O Lord, please don't burn us,
Don't grill or toast your flock,
Don't put us on a barbecue,
Or simmer us in stock,
Don't braise us or bake or boil us,
Or stir-fry us in a wok.
Oh please don't lightly poach us,
Or baste us with hot fat,
Don't fricassee or roast us,
Or boil us in a vat,
And please don't stick thy servants, Lord,
In a Rotissomat.
Do we pray like this?
[PAUSE]
The Lord Jesus tells us
that we can be bold in our prayer.
We are allowed to ask.
However, that does not automatically
mean that the answer to the prayer will be “yes”.
Sometimes the answer will be “no”
and other times it will be silence.
God is not an ogre
– He is very much concerned with that
which is really good for us,
though we can’t always see
what is really good for us.
Perhaps our prayers would be better suited
to getting to know Him
A reporter asks Mother Theresa of Calcutta
-now Blessed Theresa of Calcutta-
“what do you say to God when you pray?”
She replies “Nothing. I listen”
“And what does He say to you?”
“Nothing,” says the aged nun, “He listens.”
Yes, this does sound like
one of those useless and unfathomable pieces
of Christian mysticism,
but how do we expect to communicate wih anyone,
let alone God without actually listening
to them.
[PAUSE]
When you pray, are you always asking for something?
Or sometimes, just sometimes, do you listen?
Let us pray.
[PAUSE for shuffling]
Interesting!
Why did you do that?
All that shuffling and shifting in your seat,
making the benches creak and groan
like an oak tree during
the elephant nesting season.
It’s an automatic response,
a ceremony, that when someone says
“Let us pray”, everyone slumps forward
in their seat.
Does that mean that
you’ve all been hypnotised
so that when the phrase “let us pray” is uttered,
you are to believe that your spines
have turned to rice pudding?
Of course not.
That’s the way you’ve been taught to pray
– bowing your head,
putting your hands together
and perhaps closing your eyes.
And what is it that you do when you pray?
[PAUSE]
It must be difficult
if you don’t believe in God.
What do you do when others are praying?
Sit there and think,
“Oh do come on, you’re boring me silly?”
or does your mind wander
to what you have to do today:
beat year 10 to
the Krispy Kreme Doughnut sale,
create foul and pungent aromas in Chemistry
that will strip the paint off of the walls
as far as D/T
or find 100 different chat-up lines
to entice Pixie Lott out on a date with you.
Perhaps actually, you do pray.
“Please God,
let me launch a nuke tonight in COD.”
“Please God,
let there be a chocolate-covered doughnut left.”
“Please God,
don’t let the test on the subjunctive
be today.”
“Please God,
make Pixie Lott drive by in the limo,
get a puncture have to stop by the school,
just as I am there.
Please help me to lift the car up by one hand
whilst changing the wheel with my teeth,
so that she’ll think I’m hench
and thus want to go on a date with me.”
And what do you suppose
God’s reactions to these prayers are?
[PAUSE]
Perhaps you pray the prayer
that’s being prayed out loud.
Try this one for size,
and this time focus on the prayer itself.
Let us pray.
Prevent us, O Lord, in all our doings
with thy most gracious favour,
and further us with thy continual help;
that in all our works,
begun,
continued,
and ended in thee,
we may glorify thy holy Name,
and finally by thy mercy
obtain everlasting life;
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Of course you realise that
the original meaning of "prevent"
was "go before".
How did you cope with praying that?
How did you cope with praying that?
Oh dear, back to Miss Lott again were we?
If your mind was wandering during that,
don’t worry,
it even happens to the professionals!
St Augustine even moans about
his mind wandering.
But he uses the words
to focus his mind back to prayer.
If, however, all your prayer consists of is
“Please God let me able to do such and such”
and
“Please God make whosits to do blank”
then you are missing the point of prayer.
Yes, prayer is about communicating with God.
How is presenting God
with a shopping list of your requirements
communication?
Are our prayers reducing God
to the level of the Genie of the Lamp,
a being whose only purpose
is to do what we want?
[PAUSE]
So just how should we pray?
One of the disciples asks Jesus the very same question.
He replies with the Lord’s Prayer.
Now that's a homily on it's own!
While some of us know this prayer off by heart,
others of us don’t.
It’s worth looking at it carefully by yourself,
because in it we find that prayer
isn’t just about asking for help
with the problems in our lives, small or great.
It’s about asking for help to live life
with God
in a very personal and intimate relationship
despite the problems that life throws at us.
The Lord Jesus goes on to say that
God does actually know
both what we want
and what we really need
before we even ask Him.
The point is that we recognise His existence
as a figure who cares.
By asking Him for things in prayer,
we recognise that we need Him.
You might think of this as grovelling.
As Monty Python would say
O Lord, please don't burn us,
Don't grill or toast your flock,
Don't put us on a barbecue,
Or simmer us in stock,
Don't braise us or bake or boil us,
Or stir-fry us in a wok.
Oh please don't lightly poach us,
Or baste us with hot fat,
Don't fricassee or roast us,
Or boil us in a vat,
And please don't stick thy servants, Lord,
In a Rotissomat.
Do we pray like this?
[PAUSE]
The Lord Jesus tells us
that we can be bold in our prayer.
We are allowed to ask.
However, that does not automatically
mean that the answer to the prayer will be “yes”.
Sometimes the answer will be “no”
and other times it will be silence.
God is not an ogre
– He is very much concerned with that
which is really good for us,
though we can’t always see
what is really good for us.
Perhaps our prayers would be better suited
to getting to know Him
A reporter asks Mother Theresa of Calcutta
-now Blessed Theresa of Calcutta-
“what do you say to God when you pray?”
She replies “Nothing. I listen”
“And what does He say to you?”
“Nothing,” says the aged nun, “He listens.”
Yes, this does sound like
one of those useless and unfathomable pieces
of Christian mysticism,
but how do we expect to communicate wih anyone,
let alone God without actually listening
to them.
[PAUSE]
When you pray, are you always asking for something?
Or sometimes, just sometimes, do you listen?
Monday, December 07, 2009
Reasons why you shouldn't kick the Christmas Decorations!
Homily preached at Eltham College on Tuesday 1st December based (loosely) on St. Matthew ii.
Down comes the box
out of the loft.
Well,
eventually,
after Dad manages
to wedge it stuck in the loft doorway,
and only frees it
with a good kicking.
After dusting it down,
the box is opened.
Thus begins the task
of unpacking
the Christmas decorations.
Dad is trying to work out
where on earth to put them this year.
Mum's put the new chest of drawers
in the place where the Christmas tree
used to go.
First out of the box
is that very tree,
that noble exemplar
of Christmas decorations,
proud, lush,
green and elegant.
Of course,
this Christmas tree is plastic
and 12 months in the loft
have rendered it scrunched up
and misshapen,
resembling less a pine tree
and more
an ancient, green
giant lavatory brush.
Next out of the box
is a shoebox marked
“Tree Decorations – Be Careful”
in thick black marker.
The fact that the shoebox
makes a noise
not unlike broken glass
reminds Dad
that kicking the box down from the loft
wasn’t a good idea.
Now he has to make
a trip to Bluewater
to pick up new baubles
and other decorations.
In another shoebox lies the fairy.
However,
decades of facing the agony
of being thrust on the very top of the tree
have taken their toll.
Now she looks about as glamorous
as the discarded Barbie Doll
that Dad sat on last year
- another item on Dad’s shopping list.
And so it goes on.
The tinsel is in a knot
that defies the laws of physics.
The fairy lights have blown a fuse.
And the Baby Jesus
in the very expensive Nativity Set
seems to have been replaced with
a Lego Darth Vader.
The resulting search for the Lord
in an Imperial Tie Fighter
is fruitless.
“Oh,” says Mum,
“why do we bother with this.
It’s the same every year.”
Mum’s got a point don’t you think?
[PAUSE]
Year after year we see,
and sometimes wrestle with,
the same old Christmas decorations
to the extent that they seem commonplace.
Most of you will have seen
between 11 and 19 Christmasses.
Some staff members
are candidates for having witnessed
the first Christmas,
so think what it’s like for them!
We sing of “White Christmasses”,
yet only 13% of the Christmasses
since 1950 were white.
Our Christmas cards show
robins and snow scenes,
happy snowmen scampering cheerully
without fear of boys with flamethrowers,
carol-singers still happy to sing
“Once in Royal”
for the 15,973th time,
lovely country sides from long ago.
However,
a Christmas card
with a bunch of hoodies standing
shivering under a bus shelter
graffitoing
“Happy Chrimbo aiiight”
would not make the front of a card,
yet it’s more realistic given
that we are now in the 21st Century.
It’s difficult to see how relevant
these old fashioned images are
to modern-day folk like us.
But then they all point to an event
even further back in time
– namely the Birth of Christ.
We have to cross oceans of Time
to understand the events
of the original Nativity scene,
especially one without Darth Vader present.
How can an event two thousand years
distant be made relevant to us now?
[PAUSE]
This is the trouble with our modern world.
You can’t easily compare hoodies with shepherds,
or bank managers with the Magi,
or the manager of Travelodge
with a surly innkeeper with built-in stable.
Precise comparisons don’t exist,
but there are parallels that we can look for,
if we understand the imagery.
According to the Legend,
St Boniface stopped a child being sacrificed
by pagans worshipping a tree
by cutting the tree down.
In its place sprang a fir tree
which St Boniface declared holy,
and this subsequently
became the Christmas tree.
You may believe that legend or you may not.
Seeing that there seem
to be no records of Christmas trees
before the 16th Century,
it makes it seem that it is just a story.
Can we be sure though?
Nonetheless,
by putting up a Christmas tree
you are constructing a symbol
that points to Jesus as the Saviour of Mankind.
Just as the child was saved
from the pagans by St Boniface,
so has Mankind been saved by Christ.
But you have to get the symbols right.
In recent years
it was thought that
tinsel represented the guts of one’s enemies
strewn across the sacred tree
and the baubles certain other parts
of his body
(use your imagination).
However,
tinsel wasn’t invented until 1610,
and the practice of hanging ribbons
around a tree served purely as decoration,
adding a bit of colour
to the green branches.
Baubles were meant to represent apples,
the fruit of the tree which brings us back
to the story of Adam and Eve.
Remember that Adam and Eve
ate of the fruit
of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil
and were banned
from the Garden of Eden.
Christ was born in the world
in order to reverse that sin,
and that is why the baubles
are on the tree to remind us of this.
The fairy on the tree
used to be an archangel,
probably St Gabriel
who announced the Birth of Christ
to Our Lady.
[PAUSE]
All these symbols
have a place in our homes each Christmas,
and yet we often forget them
or miss them
or sit on them,
or wonder why we bother
when the Fairy lights fizzle
and go out again for the 167th time.
Do you use
the traditional decorations?
Why do you put up what you do?
What meaning is there
in these decorations for you
this Christmas time?
Down comes the box
out of the loft.
Well,
eventually,
after Dad manages
to wedge it stuck in the loft doorway,
and only frees it
with a good kicking.
After dusting it down,
the box is opened.
Thus begins the task
of unpacking
the Christmas decorations.
Dad is trying to work out
where on earth to put them this year.
Mum's put the new chest of drawers
in the place where the Christmas tree
used to go.
First out of the box
is that very tree,
that noble exemplar
of Christmas decorations,
proud, lush,
green and elegant.
Of course,
this Christmas tree is plastic
and 12 months in the loft
have rendered it scrunched up
and misshapen,
resembling less a pine tree
and more
an ancient, green
giant lavatory brush.
Next out of the box
is a shoebox marked
“Tree Decorations – Be Careful”
in thick black marker.
The fact that the shoebox
makes a noise
not unlike broken glass
reminds Dad
that kicking the box down from the loft
wasn’t a good idea.
Now he has to make
a trip to Bluewater
to pick up new baubles
and other decorations.
In another shoebox lies the fairy.
However,
decades of facing the agony
of being thrust on the very top of the tree
have taken their toll.
Now she looks about as glamorous
as the discarded Barbie Doll
that Dad sat on last year
- another item on Dad’s shopping list.
And so it goes on.
The tinsel is in a knot
that defies the laws of physics.
The fairy lights have blown a fuse.
And the Baby Jesus
in the very expensive Nativity Set
seems to have been replaced with
a Lego Darth Vader.
The resulting search for the Lord
in an Imperial Tie Fighter
is fruitless.
“Oh,” says Mum,
“why do we bother with this.
It’s the same every year.”
Mum’s got a point don’t you think?
[PAUSE]
Year after year we see,
and sometimes wrestle with,
the same old Christmas decorations
to the extent that they seem commonplace.
Most of you will have seen
between 11 and 19 Christmasses.
Some staff members
are candidates for having witnessed
the first Christmas,
so think what it’s like for them!
We sing of “White Christmasses”,
yet only 13% of the Christmasses
since 1950 were white.
Our Christmas cards show
robins and snow scenes,
happy snowmen scampering cheerully
without fear of boys with flamethrowers,
carol-singers still happy to sing
“Once in Royal”
for the 15,973th time,
lovely country sides from long ago.
However,
a Christmas card
with a bunch of hoodies standing
shivering under a bus shelter
graffitoing
“Happy Chrimbo aiiight”
would not make the front of a card,
yet it’s more realistic given
that we are now in the 21st Century.
It’s difficult to see how relevant
these old fashioned images are
to modern-day folk like us.
But then they all point to an event
even further back in time
– namely the Birth of Christ.
We have to cross oceans of Time
to understand the events
of the original Nativity scene,
especially one without Darth Vader present.
How can an event two thousand years
distant be made relevant to us now?
[PAUSE]
This is the trouble with our modern world.
You can’t easily compare hoodies with shepherds,
or bank managers with the Magi,
or the manager of Travelodge
with a surly innkeeper with built-in stable.
Precise comparisons don’t exist,
but there are parallels that we can look for,
if we understand the imagery.
According to the Legend,
St Boniface stopped a child being sacrificed
by pagans worshipping a tree
by cutting the tree down.
In its place sprang a fir tree
which St Boniface declared holy,
and this subsequently
became the Christmas tree.
You may believe that legend or you may not.
Seeing that there seem
to be no records of Christmas trees
before the 16th Century,
it makes it seem that it is just a story.
Can we be sure though?
Nonetheless,
by putting up a Christmas tree
you are constructing a symbol
that points to Jesus as the Saviour of Mankind.
Just as the child was saved
from the pagans by St Boniface,
so has Mankind been saved by Christ.
But you have to get the symbols right.
In recent years
it was thought that
tinsel represented the guts of one’s enemies
strewn across the sacred tree
and the baubles certain other parts
of his body
(use your imagination).
However,
tinsel wasn’t invented until 1610,
and the practice of hanging ribbons
around a tree served purely as decoration,
adding a bit of colour
to the green branches.
Baubles were meant to represent apples,
the fruit of the tree which brings us back
to the story of Adam and Eve.
Remember that Adam and Eve
ate of the fruit
of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil
and were banned
from the Garden of Eden.
Christ was born in the world
in order to reverse that sin,
and that is why the baubles
are on the tree to remind us of this.
The fairy on the tree
used to be an archangel,
probably St Gabriel
who announced the Birth of Christ
to Our Lady.
[PAUSE]
All these symbols
have a place in our homes each Christmas,
and yet we often forget them
or miss them
or sit on them,
or wonder why we bother
when the Fairy lights fizzle
and go out again for the 167th time.
Do you use
the traditional decorations?
Why do you put up what you do?
What meaning is there
in these decorations for you
this Christmas time?
Friday, November 13, 2009
Trick or Triskaidekaphobia?
Homily preached at Eltham College on Friday 13th November 2009, based on Acts xvii.22-31 and Romans viii.28.
It’s Friday 13th!
Your alarm-clock fails to go off
at the correct time
causing you to oversleep
by half an hour.
You leap out of bed
only to find that
the cat’s been sick on your school shirt
and the only clean one you have
isn’t technically clean
but has been lying under your bed
for the past week
where it has been discarded
after a very overactive game
of Wii tennis and has acquired
a smell that can curdle milk
at three metres.
You race downstairs only to find
that your sister has eaten
the last of the Coco Pops,
the milk has curdled having been
in close proximity to your shirt,
leaving you only with toast
which you have to eat quickly
because you’re late for the coach.
You hurtle to the coach stop
only to see it disappear
into the distance as you arrive.
When you finally get to school,
you find that you’ve left at home
the Latin homework
due in to the Headmaster today
without fail.
And here you are now,
sitting here listening
to a catalogue of your woes on Friday 13th,
worrying about
just how the day has it in for you.
What are you going to do
about all the bad luck that lies in store today?
[PAUSE]
Perhaps you try to ward it off.
Make sure that you don’t walk under a ladder.
Check your Horoscope.
Hope that you’ve packed your lucky rabbit’s foot.
Mug a horse for its shoe.
How do these things really affect your luck
for good or bad?
[PAUSE]
It is possible that there is
some Harry Potter magical connection
between a rabbit’s foot
and having good luck,
but let’s be frank:
it wasn’t terribly lucky for the rabbit,
was it?
A horseshoe may bring good luck,
but not if it falls off the wall
and bounces off of your head.
In our culture today,
there seem to be many
of these superstitions
that still exist.
People are frightened by Friday 13th,
others knock on wood,
or cringe when they cross on the stairs,
others are afraid to tread on the cracks
in the pavement
and so wend their way down the street
skittering about like a sparrow with fleas.
Literally the word “superstition”
means “standing over”
and describes the sense of foreboding
that we get when we know
that something’s not quite right
but cannot put our finger on it.
So, you see,
all superstition has its root in fear,
especially fear of the unknown.
Those who have problems with Friday 13th
are associating a particular day with bad luck
because they have a fear of the unknown future.
It’s true to say to a certain extent
that Friday 13th is statistically unluckier
than other days for the simple reason
that people expect it to be unluckier
than other days.
They engineer their own bad luck,
just as you did when you forgot
to set your alarm last night,
or take your clean shirt off of the floor
out of the way
of a fur-ball ridden moggy.
At the heart of every superstition
lies a great paralysing fear
that can seize control over our lives,
cause us to behave irrationally
and make life less enjoyable for us.
Let’s face it,
we’re going to have some days when things go well,
and days when everything seems to go wrong.
That’s what life is like,
and we cannot escape it.
The best thing we can do
is to look rationally about what we can do
to make the best of the bad times.
We are all afraid of the unknown
– that’s natural.
But think of the fears you’ve already conquered.
Arriving here at Eltham College for the first time,
meeting new faces,
and most chilling of all,
coming face to face with Mr Roberts.
But you got over them,
and you did not need a lucky horseshoe
to get you through them.
[PAUSE]
Sometimes,
life’s bad luck can get very hard,
and lots of people turn to God for guidance.
It’s true that some people think that
if we please God,
then we’ll get good luck.
However,
Christian worship of God is not about
trying to gain His good favour
like some kind of grovelling little toady,
but rather it is about entering into
an active relationship with God.
Christians believe that
because the Lord Jesus has died on our behalf,
there is no need to appease God.
We are already in His good books
if we truly work at a
committed,
sincere
and loving relationship with Him.
However,
that doesn’t mean we escape
bad luck in this life.
There is nothing wrong
in praying to God for good fortune,
but it may be more important for our benefit
that we do not receive what we want in life.
We do not pray to God
just to get our own way
and in order to avoid the bad things
that happen to us.
We do not get good luck
just because we have been good,
or bad luck when we’ve been bad.
God is not a genie,
and our belief in Him has evolved
from this primitive idea.
Christians know that in all things
God works for the good of those who love Him.
This means that even the worst luck
has the potential for making us happy
by making us better people.
It hurts,
but so does having an injection at the dentist.
[PAUSE]
It is Friday 13th today.
Is today really going to be unlucky for you?
It’s Friday 13th!
Your alarm-clock fails to go off
at the correct time
causing you to oversleep
by half an hour.
You leap out of bed
only to find that
the cat’s been sick on your school shirt
and the only clean one you have
isn’t technically clean
but has been lying under your bed
for the past week
where it has been discarded
after a very overactive game
of Wii tennis and has acquired
a smell that can curdle milk
at three metres.
You race downstairs only to find
that your sister has eaten
the last of the Coco Pops,
the milk has curdled having been
in close proximity to your shirt,
leaving you only with toast
which you have to eat quickly
because you’re late for the coach.
You hurtle to the coach stop
only to see it disappear
into the distance as you arrive.
When you finally get to school,
you find that you’ve left at home
the Latin homework
due in to the Headmaster today
without fail.
And here you are now,
sitting here listening
to a catalogue of your woes on Friday 13th,
worrying about
just how the day has it in for you.
What are you going to do
about all the bad luck that lies in store today?
[PAUSE]
Perhaps you try to ward it off.
Make sure that you don’t walk under a ladder.
Check your Horoscope.
Hope that you’ve packed your lucky rabbit’s foot.
Mug a horse for its shoe.
How do these things really affect your luck
for good or bad?
[PAUSE]
It is possible that there is
some Harry Potter magical connection
between a rabbit’s foot
and having good luck,
but let’s be frank:
it wasn’t terribly lucky for the rabbit,
was it?
A horseshoe may bring good luck,
but not if it falls off the wall
and bounces off of your head.
In our culture today,
there seem to be many
of these superstitions
that still exist.
People are frightened by Friday 13th,
others knock on wood,
or cringe when they cross on the stairs,
others are afraid to tread on the cracks
in the pavement
and so wend their way down the street
skittering about like a sparrow with fleas.
Literally the word “superstition”
means “standing over”
and describes the sense of foreboding
that we get when we know
that something’s not quite right
but cannot put our finger on it.
So, you see,
all superstition has its root in fear,
especially fear of the unknown.
Those who have problems with Friday 13th
are associating a particular day with bad luck
because they have a fear of the unknown future.
It’s true to say to a certain extent
that Friday 13th is statistically unluckier
than other days for the simple reason
that people expect it to be unluckier
than other days.
They engineer their own bad luck,
just as you did when you forgot
to set your alarm last night,
or take your clean shirt off of the floor
out of the way
of a fur-ball ridden moggy.
At the heart of every superstition
lies a great paralysing fear
that can seize control over our lives,
cause us to behave irrationally
and make life less enjoyable for us.
Let’s face it,
we’re going to have some days when things go well,
and days when everything seems to go wrong.
That’s what life is like,
and we cannot escape it.
The best thing we can do
is to look rationally about what we can do
to make the best of the bad times.
We are all afraid of the unknown
– that’s natural.
But think of the fears you’ve already conquered.
Arriving here at Eltham College for the first time,
meeting new faces,
and most chilling of all,
coming face to face with Mr Roberts.
But you got over them,
and you did not need a lucky horseshoe
to get you through them.
[PAUSE]
Sometimes,
life’s bad luck can get very hard,
and lots of people turn to God for guidance.
It’s true that some people think that
if we please God,
then we’ll get good luck.
However,
Christian worship of God is not about
trying to gain His good favour
like some kind of grovelling little toady,
but rather it is about entering into
an active relationship with God.
Christians believe that
because the Lord Jesus has died on our behalf,
there is no need to appease God.
We are already in His good books
if we truly work at a
committed,
sincere
and loving relationship with Him.
However,
that doesn’t mean we escape
bad luck in this life.
There is nothing wrong
in praying to God for good fortune,
but it may be more important for our benefit
that we do not receive what we want in life.
We do not pray to God
just to get our own way
and in order to avoid the bad things
that happen to us.
We do not get good luck
just because we have been good,
or bad luck when we’ve been bad.
God is not a genie,
and our belief in Him has evolved
from this primitive idea.
Christians know that in all things
God works for the good of those who love Him.
This means that even the worst luck
has the potential for making us happy
by making us better people.
It hurts,
but so does having an injection at the dentist.
[PAUSE]
It is Friday 13th today.
Is today really going to be unlucky for you?
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